Brookings Register | New Native American mentoring program in South Dakota builds lifetime bonds

When Coleman Eagle Elk first met a boy he expects to mentor from youth to adulthood, he used an ancient indigenous instrument to find common ground through song.

Eagle Elk met the 5-year-old boy and his mother at their home, then took the child to the Rapid City offices of the Friends of the Children. The new non-profit organization in western South Dakota pairs professional adult mentors with Native American children who have suffered trauma or abuse in their families.

Once at the office, Eagle Elk sat with the boy and played a ceremonial Native American bass drum while singing songs and building a bridge of trust, support and friendship that could last a lifetime.

“I set the big drum up and I told him that I’m your relative, your ‘Leksi,’” recalled Eagle Elk, 31. “I told him that the drum is not just a piece of wood with rawhide on it, but that there’s a spirit in there, so we’ll be able to be open and honest with each other.”

Eagle Elk, who has several years of experience counseling at-risk children, said he felt an immediate connection with the boy and believes the bond was mutual. And it all began with the two-person drum circle during their inaugural meeting.

“Being able to touch that cultural hunger that we as Native people have since birth, I saw his spirit light up,” Eagle Elk said. “I heard his little voice beneath the loud drum. And while it was quiet, we were able to make that connection that some Native youth in Rapid City don’t have access to.”

The Friends of the Children He Sapa is the newest branch of the national organization, based in Oregon, which for nearly three decades has paired paid, full-time professional mentors with thousands of at-risk children to help them grow into stable teenagers and eventually successful, well-rounded adults.

The organization, funded largely by major charities and foundations from across the U.S., boasts a strong record of success.

Data show that more than 8 in 10 earn a high school diploma or equivalency, 93% remain outside the juvenile justice system and 98% do not become parents in their teen years. Historical results also show that 92% of participants go on to higher education, the military or into the workforce.

A Harvard University study of the organization found that for each dollar invested in a mentee, the community benefits by $7 in saved social costs and that each child who completes the program saves the local community $900,000 in justice system, health care and teen parenting costs.

The South Dakota organization is the first Friends of the Children chapter to focus specifically on children in a specific cultural group, in this case indigenous boys and girls from Rapid City and the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation.

But like all chapters, the South Dakota group employs and trains salaried mentors to spend a minimum of four years with mentees and up to 12 years or more in many cases, meeting for several hours a week with the child in their school, home and at shared activities.

The need is great in South Dakota, where Native American children trail their majority white peers by significant margins in almost every educational metric, including academic achievement in math, English and science as well as in chronic absenteeism and disciplinary issues, according to state Department of Education data. Indigenous families also suffer disproportionate levels of poverty, substance abuse and low life expectancy.

The South Dakota Friends chapter was born out of $2 million in donations the organization received in 2022 from King Philanthropies and #startsmall, two national charities.

The larger, long-term goal of Friends of the Children is to use the fledgling Rapid City chapter as a model for how to bring the program to more Indigenous populations in South Dakota or other states.

Tasha Fridia-Mousseau, director of tribal programs for the national Friends program, said the organization has helped many Indigenous youth in the past but has recently made it a greater focus, especially with the launch of the South Dakota program.

Since launching in South Dakota, Fridia-Mousseau said the organization has received interest in developing the program in other tribal nations across the county and in other parts of the state, including in Sioux Falls.

The South Dakota chapter launched in August 2022 and has since hired a staff of 10, five of whom are mentors who will each develop relationships with four children.

Valeriah Big Eagle, executive director of the South Dakota Friends chapter, led the launch of the group in 2022 and now focuses on growing its reach and the number of children enrolled.

Children are selected at ages 4-6 and are chosen based on the greatest need for outside intervention and the highest likelihood of finding success within the program, Big Eagle said.

The mentors, referred to as “friends,” or “relatives” within the South Dakota program, are paid a living wage of $45,000 to $50,000 a year and agree to spend three to four years minimum mentoring their assigned children.

Mentors are expected to spend 14 to 16 hours a month with their mentees while also maintaining close ties to the families of the children. In addition to mentoring the youth, the mentors are trained to aid families in times of crisis.

For example, Friends of the Children representatives recently provided the family of a SD mentee with counseling and cultural support after an incident of sexual abuse occurred within the extended family, Big Eagle said.

The Friends group has developed formal partnerships with many local and regional education and community entities, including school systems in Rapid City and Pine Ridge as well as the Oglala Sioux Tribe, Rural America Initiatives, Youth & Family Services and the Great Plains Tribal Leaders Health Board. The group recently inked a partnership with the Children’s Home Society of the Black Hills, Big Eagle said.

— This article was produced by South Dakota News Watch, a non-profit journalism organization located online at sdnewswatch.org